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Three lines

03 Feb

Dance

         

          on the floor

          moves like a floating pollen

          sparkling eyes

 

 

 

 

PS:My first attempt of writing a Haiku.Please drop your opinion about it.

Inspired by the theme PRIDE at

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4 Comments

Posted by on February 3, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

4 responses to “Three lines

  1. Cathy Tenzo

    February 5, 2013 at 6:34 pm

    I like it and it paints a strong image.

     
    • Vidya

      February 6, 2013 at 5:13 pm

      Thanks a lot 🙂 I’m glad you liked it

       
  2. ElizOF

    February 6, 2013 at 8:30 pm

    Beautiful haiku and imagery… Only tip is since you’re using the 3-5-3 syllables haiku approach, the middle line on your post has too many syllables. 🙂
    Eli

     
    • Vidya

      February 8, 2013 at 12:58 am

      I’ll double check the syllables from next time(Little weak to figure them out).Just posted what came into my mind.Thanks a lot for your valuable suggestion 🙂

       

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